To the Overwhelmed Mom: A Message of Grace

Dear overwhelmed mom,

 

I see you. I watch you from behind my own tasks and responsibilities and know that someday that will be me. I will feel the demands of little arms reaching up and wanting this and thinking that you are there to please them forever. I will feel the demands of running a home and a full time mom job 24/7.

But I also see you when you stop and put on smile and for just a second become fully invested in that little voice below you. No matter what’s going on in your mind. That makes me smile.
A young mom gets a flower from her young boy in a sweet family photoBecause when I peer back in my past, and you know what I remember? Not the food, not the clean house, not the perfectly scheduled school year. I remember the times my mom stopped what she was doing and we dropped all of our responsibilities to go sit outside. I remember happily sitting on a swing with her as she made up songs on the spot about the beautiful day we were sitting in. It didn’t matter if there was dirt on the floor. It didn’t matter if we didn’t get math done that day. (Probably because I avoided it like the plague) We don’t know about all the responsibilities you carry in your mind. But we do know that we love you and all we want to do is spend time with you simply doing things together. We don’t realize the pressures you feel each and every day. But we do realize that the best thing that happens to us is when you slow down and just be with us.

I remember when my mom became a little kid with me and played pretend. I cooked her food and giggled at her pretend eating as she joked with me. She came to my level instead of demanding my little brain understand she was too busy to play with me.

Your attention is the best gift we could get.

Every minute you take to spend with us is noticed. Even if we don’t seem grateful for it the next minute. There are so many of us who don’t have that minute with you.

I promise that everything will be ok. The earth won’t stop if you pause for a minute. Dirt doesn’t multiply by the second. (Although it might multiply by the hour)

I want you to know that even though you felt like no one in your family noticed that piece of grace you gave them while everything within you screamed to return their selfishness with your own. Or if they trampled on your gift of love that you felt should’ve been applauded and held up for recognition. If they failed to notice that you gave a soft answer to their irate one. If they didn’t realize that you gave up some of your treasured free time to serve them. If no one was grateful for the sacrifice you made for them, but instead, demanded more when you felt like you had nothing left to give. All of that. Whatever it is. It still matters. Because even if your family doesn’t appreciate or acknowledge your actions, it has served to mold you and make you into a better mom than you were a few seconds ago. There is still a reason for keeping on and pushing forward into a life of secret and un-thanked service. It is molding you into the mother that you will be known as. It’s a process of refinement by fire. And you’re in the best kind of company in this kind of refinement. Don’t let poor responses discourage you from making more good choices and willing sacrifices. So today, before we commit to anything else, let us love more fully, more sacrificially, and more grace-filled than before. Knowing that all of us are looking for the reward that is more exceeding and abundant than we can ever imagine.

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  • Dawn Reitmair said:

    Hi! Ms Caitlin. I'm one of Stephan's adoptive moms :)
    Though I'll admit, I haven't read all of this (it made me too teary eyed), what I did read was beautifully written. You have a way with words!
    Congrats on your newest adventure (enjoy being engaged.. Marriage will come soon enough and this only happens once).
    I cannot wait to personally meet you.
    We think VERY highly of Stephen around here. I know you know, you've picked a gem!!
    Looking forward to being able to read the rest of this... And the story you'll share soon! I just got another tear in my eye ;)
    Dawn Reitmair

    • photograhybyc said:

      Mrs. Dawn!! I've heard so much about you!! :) Thank you so, so much for your sweet words. And yes, I don't know how I've been so blessed, many times I definitely feel I don't deserve him. :) I can't wait to meet you, either!!
      Aww, thank you! I actually just posted the first part (of four!)! You can find it here: http://photographybycaitlin.net/our-story-part-1/ :)
      And don't worry about the misspell, I didn't even notice and I get misspellings ALL the time. :)

  • Dawn Reitmair said:

    Oct 12th?? You're killing me ;)

    You've been blessed because you've made godly decisions... This I have no doubt!

    Let me know when you're flying/driving to Colorado ;D

    • photograhybyc said:

      Hahaha, that seems to be the general reaction that everyone is having. ;)
      And we will definitely let you know when we head up that way. ;)

      • Dawn Reitmair said:

        .... You don't have to bring Stephen. We don't like him *that* much. ;p

        • Dawn Reitmair said:

          Woohoo. I figured out the correct 'reply' button.

          Yes. Yes, you should be proud... Those brain cells don't click like they used to! We'll talk after lots of kids!! Or a set, or 2, of twins.. Either way! :/

          I won't keep highjacking this post.... I'll stalk you on email soon :D

          God bless!!

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